[00:00:00] Deanna Kitchen: Welcome back to the podcast. I am so excited to share today's guest with you. We are digging into exploring the beautiful connection between kindness and our wellbeing. The, the connection between the spirit and the science. I'm. So honored to introduce you today to Dr. Darvish. Dr. Darvish is a naturopathic physician and she's also the author of The Golden Gate, unleashing Your Feminine Powers to Graceful Aging, Dr.
[00:00:28] Deanna Kitchen: Darvish, we are thrilled to have you here with us today.
[00:00:31] Dr. Darvish: Thank you so much, Deanna. It's, it's an honor, truly an honor to be part of this podcast today, so thank you so much.
[00:00:38] Deanna Kitchen: We're, we are excited to get to dig into this conversation. Um, to start out with, can you share with us a little bit more about your practice and, and your story?
[00:00:50] Dr. Darvish: Well, I am a naturopathic physician and I specialize in longevity and regenerative medicine as well as, uh, chronic complex illness and cancer. And, um, I'm the founder of Holistic Medical Center out here in Bellevue, Washington, and I've been practicing for over 30 years now. It's hard to believe that, but.
[00:01:11] Dr. Darvish: 30 years, uh, last September. So, um, it's been such an honor and a blessing to be part of the journey of so many people, both people who are really, uh, challenged with their health and wellbeing and other people who just wanna optimize their health. Hormones, menopause, everything else, you know? So, uh, it's been such a wonderful journey for me and, uh, to come across people like you.
[00:01:36] Dr. Darvish: I've, I've been just blessed with amazing people around me and people who walk into the office to have really deep conversation. And it, it gives me the opportunity to be of kindness to them and, uh, to be of service to them. So that is really very, very special to me. So thank you.
[00:01:56] Deanna Kitchen: Oh my goodness. What a beautiful, uh, what a beautiful life's work and what joy in, in that. And through that, um, Dr. Darvish, I would love to kind of open this conversation with some of our listeners may be saying, wait, this is a different speed than what we normally do. You know, very often we are talking about.
[00:02:16] Deanna Kitchen: Stories of, um, transformation through the power of giving, through the power of kindness through, through the process of growing and giving flowers. This is so fun because we get to dig in together and, and look at something I think that we all intuitively know and feel. Um. But look at the science behind that.
[00:02:37] Deanna Kitchen: And I think one of the things that if whenever we have been a person who's engaged in an act of kindness, engaged in serving in our communities, we know that there is something about that that changes us and makes us feel so much better. But I'd love to dig in today and talk a little bit more about.
[00:02:58] Deanna Kitchen: The actual science behind that, there's, that's not, it's not an anomaly, it's not a just a feeling we have. It's something that really is happening within us. Can you share more? You've done so much work. Particularly, I loved reading your book and just the beautiful picture of what happens when we lean into, um.
[00:03:21] Deanna Kitchen: Who, who we are as women especially, um, and how we move through the world, um, and how that affects us on a, on a cellular level. Um, can you share more with us today? I, I'm sure listeners are so excited to hear what ha what is actually happening within us when, when we're giving and when we're spreading kindness and when we are serving others.
[00:03:45] Dr. Darvish: You know, I did a whole talk about this, um, the TEDx
[00:03:49] Deanna Kitchen: Yes, yes.
[00:03:51] Dr. Darvish: um, promotes our longevity and, um, has such regenerative properties. Number one that comes to my mind about the science of giving in kindness is the fact that this chemical is released from our brain called oxytocin. oxytocin is that first hormone that babies release in order to bond with their mother. You know, and think about that, how powerful that nurturing and connection is. That baby just yearns to be connected with the mother continuously. And um, it's because of this hormone oxytocin. And so when we do acts of kindness, when we are connecting with others, when we are, um, giving. We are actually, our brain is releasing this oxytocin, which has incredible anti-inflammatory powers.
[00:04:53] Dr. Darvish: It has anti-cancer properties. They've shown that oxytocin helps reduce breast cancer cell replication. I mean, it's one of the hormones that I give for patients who are fighting cancer is oxytocin, because they're probably not getting enough of it. From people around them or they're not able to do enough to give in order to receive or activate that oxytocin release.
[00:05:20] Dr. Darvish: But oxytocin is a pretty powerful hormone that has been shown to reduce our mortality, um, improve our heart, reduce blood pressure because it dilates the blood pressure, it helps reduce inflammation, and it helps reduce our stress. And cortisol, you know, how you hold a baby and everything just goes away.
[00:05:44] Dr. Darvish: No stress, just everything that you might have been. Um, concerned about in the world, the stressors just, just float away as you're just holding onto that baby. And that's the work of oxytocin. And so when we are actively, consciously creating opportunities for ourselves and others to release that oxytocin.
[00:06:07] Dr. Darvish: We're activating all of these anti-inflammatory, um, cortisol, um, decreasing cortisol stress responses, activating our. Dopamine endorphins that make us feel really happy and joyful. Oxytocin has also been shown to reduce pain, and I think one of the important things is that it activates our sense of confidence, our sense of self-worth, and just our sense of wellbeing. Um. One couple of other things with oxytocin biochemically is that it actually has been shown to improve telomere length. Now telomere are the caps at the end of our DNA and the longer that they are, the longer they stay long, the slower our aging process. And so as we get older, these telomeres shrink and so we age much quicker. But with oxytocin, it prolongs them from shortening. And so then we are actually slowing down our aging and promoting longevity. I mean, there's so much science going on about the impacts of what this hormone does. Because it is released when we do things that are kind, when we are giving, when we are sharing a hug, when we are sharing a meal, cooking a meal for somebody, um, and just, you know, giving flowers,
[00:07:37] Deanna Kitchen: Oh, I am just, it's absolutely beautiful to see when you can actually. Picture at a cellular level, what's happening within our bodies. You know, if we're, when we, I think anyone who, you know, does something kind for another person, we always walk away feeling like, oh, we are the ones that we're receiving because you feel so good.
[00:07:59] Deanna Kitchen: But there it is explained like that is the science behind why that happens, and that's so powerful to know that we. We have, um, the ability to control that in our lives by making those choices to move in kindness and to engage in community and how beautiful to see that it really is this just upward cycle.
[00:08:26] Deanna Kitchen: The more that we're kind and give, the more oxytocin we experience, which allows us to enter into deeper and fuller connections, and then deeper and fuller connections. You know, just allow that to keep cycling upward. That is. So beautiful to see and hear actually what is happening at that cellular level within us.
[00:08:45] Deanna Kitchen: And to think that, you know, we talk a lot about how. There's no such thing as a small act of kindness, and we never know how far, you know, the ripple of just one act of kindness, the impact that it could have in another person's life. But to think about that an act of kindness is not only directly improving the health and wellbeing of others, but we're we're also having this reciprocal effect in our own lives of improving our own health and wellbeing and longevity.
[00:09:18] Deanna Kitchen: Through that process, it's truly beautiful to
[00:09:21] Dr. Darvish: It. It is. It's absolutely beautiful. And there is a, um. Dual relationship. So when, when we are doing something that is of giving in kindness and that oxytocin is released in us, it's not just released in us, it's also released in the receiver. And so you know, you are actually helping the other person promote their longevity and their wellbeing and their sense of awe and beauty in this world. And I think that is so powerful and that's, I think, one of the most important reasons why. We should make conscious effort to visit people who are sick or who are elderly, or who are weak because there is an exchange of energy. There's an exchange of this hormone that's being released. There's an exchange of cellular shifts and strength that happens for both, both of us, both me and the one that's sick.
[00:10:20] Dr. Darvish: So that's why I find myself really blessed. a physician that gets to see so many people because I'm getting filled with oxytocin all the time and I make a, I make an effort because if you come into my office, I do make an effort to give you a hug because I'm not just giving you a hug for you. It's a selfish reason.
[00:10:42] Dr. Darvish: I'm also giving a hug for me.
[00:10:44] Deanna Kitchen: I love, but I think it's that piece of wind. I so, and Frank once said, um, no one ever grows poor by giving. And I think that it's so contrary to what we feel and see societally. Um, I think that we kind of do have this, um, scarcity mindset. You know, like if I pour out too much, then there's gonna be nothing left.
[00:11:05] Deanna Kitchen: And what a beautiful picture to see that the more we pour out, the more we receive, the healthier we are. You know, not only physically, but spiritually, emotionally. The more that we give, the more that we're receiving and the more that we're capable. Of receiving and return and it, it, it like, it's just such a, um, inspiring and encouraging reminder, uh, that that truly, we aren't going to grow poor by giving.
[00:11:34] Deanna Kitchen: There is so much more that we are able to receive in doing that.
[00:11:39] Dr. Darvish: Yes. You know, I, I see ourselves as, or at least I see myself as a hollow, what I call a hollow reed, which is allowing the, the energy to come through me into the person. And, um, and if you, we see ourselves as an open VAs vessel. That flow of whether it's financial or whether it's love or connection or, um.
[00:12:04] Dr. Darvish: Support or whatever that you're seeking will come through you, and as long as it's not getting stuck, you won't get sick
[00:12:13] Deanna Kitchen: Mmm.
[00:12:13] Dr. Darvish: won't be deprived. It's when we get stuck into that, uh, realm of like what you said, scarcity or, um, you know, smallness and, um, not allow that flow of energy to go through us.
[00:12:28] Dr. Darvish: That's when, when we start feeling the sickness. So as long as we're open. You know, in every way, um, that we are able to channel that energy, then we are creating something very powerful for you, me and the community around us.
[00:12:49] Deanna Kitchen: Beautiful. Absolutely beautiful. I'm gonna pause for a second 'cause this is, I'm like, oh, we're just covering so much so quickly. This is lovely. Um, I just wanna take a quick look at my notes 'cause I did jump in my notes, which is perfectly fine. Um, I want to just make sure that I get to share all these beautiful pieces.
[00:13:07] Deanna Kitchen: Um, let's. Yeah, let's jump into this. So, Dr. Darvish, in, in your book you talk about how emotional burdens are something that can age us, and I think we're already beginning to see this picture of, of what's happening within our bodies with what we carry and what we share, um, from what you've already, already shared with us today, but can you explain that more for us?
[00:13:37] Dr. Darvish: So our system is really made to get rid of toxins, and I see toxins as environmental pollution, like chemicals and metals and plastics and glyphosates, and, but. Chemical. I mean, toxins are more than just those chemicals. There are also thoughts, negative thoughts that we carry, or negative emotions that we carry, or grudges that we hold against other people.
[00:14:07] Dr. Darvish: We're not doing anybody service, including ourselves when we are holding onto those negative thoughts and emotions. In fact, we are creating more toxic buildup, which slows down, it kind of clogs the pipes in our system and, um, doesn't allow for that energy to flow for that circulation or physical circulation or physical nervous system.
[00:14:30] Dr. Darvish: None of that starts flowing. It gets bogged down. It gets stuck when we're carrying these physical and emotional, um, toxins. And so. These toxins actually can disrupt our DNA and our cellular system and help or slow down, um, the detoxification system and then promote more aging. They can even paralyze us.
[00:15:01] Dr. Darvish: You know, physically paralyze us. I mean, I have patients that come in here to see me and, um, they've got numbness, tingling, or they're in a wheelchair because they're paralyzed by the emotions that they're carrying and the physical toxins that they're carrying. So. We need to let go of not only the physical toxins, but also the emotional toxins.
[00:15:25] Dr. Darvish: I, I find them being as magnetic to each other as possible. So for instance, if you're carrying a negative toxin, it will continuously bind and attract the negative, um, physical toxin in order to balance out in our body. I mean, that's the way our body works. And for instance, if you've got a dysfunction in the parasitic relationship with somebody, like whether it's your mother or your father, and there's a disconnect there, that's the parasitic relationship that needs to be healthy.
[00:16:01] Dr. Darvish: If there is a disconnect, we will continuously attract parasites to our body on a physical level in order for our nervous system to balance out. And so by just doing, um, anti-parasitic protocol to get rid of parasites and not working on the emotional layer of that relationship with our mother or our father or what have you, then we are doing ourselves a disservice because sooner or later the parasites will come back in one form of the,
[00:16:33] Deanna Kitchen: so interconnected, so
[00:16:35] Dr. Darvish: so interconnected and so this process of letting go, um, is of utmost importance in creating wellbeing and longevity. I mean, if you think about it, we have five systems at least that are involved in the physical. Detoxification, like your lungs, your liver, your intestines, and your kidneys and your bladder, your lymphatic system, so forth.
[00:17:06] Dr. Darvish: There's all these different systems, your skin that are involved in detoxifying and, um, on a spiritual level, we have access to these, these type of emotional, um, detox systems as well. So for instance. The liver carries anger, and so if you're not detoxifying the anger out of your system, you are gonna be presenting more with liver conditions.
[00:17:36] Dr. Darvish: Um. And you see that very vividly in somebody who's an alcoholic. They get more angry and their liver becomes more toxic with alcohol. But with alcohol, they get more angry. It's like this, this reversal, this stool relationship again, right?
[00:17:54] Deanna Kitchen: Yes, his downward spiral in this regard,
[00:17:56] Dr. Darvish: exactly. So if they're angry, they get more liver toxicity.
[00:18:01] Dr. Darvish: If they're more liver toxic, they get more angry. The lungs create or carry grief. And so when we have, um, sadness or. Grieving that we're going through and we don't allow ourselves to go through that process. We end up with lung issues. If you think about COVID and the pandemic, so it's a prime example.
[00:18:26] Dr. Darvish: Individually and community-wise, globally, we were going through this grieving process and many of us are still going through that grieving process and what was affected the most, the lungs.
[00:18:39] Deanna Kitchen: Hmm.
[00:18:40] Dr. Darvish: Right. COVID affected the lungs the most, and so we saw that this virus was a toxin to the lungs, but at the same time, the grief that we were collectively and individually experiencing was presenting itself as a weaker lung.
[00:18:57] Dr. Darvish: And so it was more sensitive to attracting that bug, that virus into our lungs and causing more inflammation. So. Then we've got the kidneys. The kidneys have to do with fear. And when we are fearful, we weaken those kidneys. And the kidneys in Chinese medicine are known as the, um, vitality organ, the QI organ, right?
[00:19:22] Dr. Darvish: And so when we are weakening our kidneys, our energy weakens, we get more tired and addressing that fear, letting go of that fear helps strengthen the. The kidneys, and then we come to the spleen and the pancreas, which has to do with worry. It's very interesting. In North America, we have a pretty fast growing incidence of insulin resistance and diabetes, which has to do with the pancreas.
[00:19:52] Dr. Darvish: And you think about the amount of worry we have in this country that we hold onto, whether it's about our kids, about the financial situation, whether, um, the political situation, whether it's about, uh, housing or families or what have you. We are in a worry mode a lot more than we were even six years ago. And this. Insulin resistance and diabetes is moving forward really fast. So instead of taking GLP ones to address, you know, suppress basically the emotional worry, looking at the actual root cause of the condition, which is worry and. Identifying where it's coming from and processing and letting it go helps strengthen that pancreas, helps strengthen our blood sugar and insulin. Now it's not the only thing. Obviously we need to focus on diet and nutrition and sleep and exercise and all of that stuff that we need to actively, um, be conscious of in our lifestyle in practicing. But a big picture of it that we are often missing is the emotional connection that we carry.
[00:21:11] Deanna Kitchen: That's such a beautiful reminder. You know, I, I think many of our listeners may be familiar with the, the phrase and the book. The Body keeps the score, but this just piece of what we're experiencing emotionally is happening, happening, and, and an experience on a cellular level within. Our body as well.
[00:21:29] Deanna Kitchen: Um, I'd love to ask, how do you see that service or meaningful giving are helping us to kind of metabolize that emotional weight and, and let go of these burdens rather than stored? Is that something that can help us in and through this process?
[00:21:47] Dr. Darvish: Oh, that's an amazing question. I truly believe so. I believe that, uh, when we give. We are focusing on somebody else, and we're taking that focus away from our own selves. We're getting out of our heads,
[00:22:06] Deanna Kitchen: Mm-hmm.
[00:22:07] Dr. Darvish: one of the
[00:22:08] Deanna Kitchen: It's a good place to be. Yeah.
[00:22:10] Dr. Darvish: is we're in our heads all the time. We're, you know, on our social media, on the computer, we, a lot of us are working from home and we are in our heads.
[00:22:21] Dr. Darvish: And, um, when we reach out and give to others. We're releasing that deep focus on that negative thoughts and negative emotions and giving it away. It's one of the, actually, one of the things that I often, um, prescribe for my patients who are dealing with maybe generational trauma. And they're focusing on baggages that they're carrying from their, let's say, grandmother, um, or a mother who's passed away.
[00:22:57] Dr. Darvish: And, and there, there is not much settlement in, in the way they feel, uh, with that mother or grandmother or whoever it is. So I asked them to go give to a charity. And just, it doesn't matter if it's 50 cents or $50,000, it really doesn't matter the amount of dollars or money. It's about the fact that you're consciously giving away in their honor a gift and giving it to the universe for you not to bury and carry anymore.
[00:23:37] Deanna Kitchen: That's beautiful.
[00:23:39] Dr. Darvish: so when we do that, when we are giving. In the honor of somebody else, we're actually not only promoting our own wellbeing, but we're also promoting the wellbeing of their spirit and their soul. If, if you believe in the life after death.
[00:23:55] Deanna Kitchen: Mm-hmm.
[00:23:56] Dr. Darvish: Right. And so that's, that's truly a powerful thing. Now my mother, she's passed away.
[00:24:01] Dr. Darvish: She passed away during the pandemic. And one of the reasons I wrote this book, uh, the Golden Gate, um, and the title basically is identifying. The capacity that women have. We can get into that in a bit. But she would always say, hush bosh and hush. Bosh means be joyful in fari. So hush means joy. Bosch means be, be joyful.
[00:24:29] Dr. Darvish: And what she meant was, don't let these heavy burdens, these fetters of this earthly life burden you and weigh you down and age you. Let it go. Just be joyful.
[00:24:44] Deanna Kitchen: Mm-hmm.
[00:24:46] Dr. Darvish: This is all transient. It's not permanence. Everything we experience in this life is very transient, and so let it go and just be joyful because at the end of the day when we pass on, we're passing on into the world that's more joyful.
[00:25:01] Dr. Darvish: So why don't we bring that joy into this world and practice it now because it does bring us so much more wellbeing and health. And connection with others. And I think that part of that giving and kindness is to create joy for ourselves, to create, to elevate ourselves to this higher state of joy, which is not an emotion.
[00:25:25] Dr. Darvish: You know, I, I have this conversation with people,
[00:25:28] Deanna Kitchen: That's actually one of the question I was gonna ask. Yes. I'd love for you to talk more about this.
[00:25:32] Dr. Darvish: Joy versus happiness. Happiness to me is very transient. You can, you can be happy and joyful. You can be sad and joyful. 'cause your joy is kind of that baseline that you're able to jump back into. Even if you're grieving, even if you're going through a loss, you can pull yourself back into that state of joy again. It doesn't negate your grieving. Grieving is an emotion. Joy is a state.
[00:25:58] Deanna Kitchen: I love that I, we, we tend to think of joy as, I think generally as joy as an emotion. Rather than a state of being. And that reframing that, um, opens the doors to so much possibility and, and power to not have to, um, exist only with an emotion that we're feeling, but rather step into a state of being and bringing that emotion along with us.
[00:26:26] Deanna Kitchen: It doesn't go away, but it doesn't, it doesn't negate the fact that emotion is still present, but it allows us, like you said. To journey and that being our state of being, that is very encouraging. On that note, I would love to talk more about, um. Your perspective and your advice, um, for ways that we can walk with this wisdom, kind of on a day-to-day basis of how to be in this joyful state you have prescribed in the past.
[00:26:59] Deanna Kitchen: Um, two very interesting things. And those are LSD and PCP.
[00:27:04] Dr. Darvish: It's T-H-C-T-H-C.
[00:27:07] Deanna Kitchen: had that wrong. Okay. Definitely. I knew it was like, I knew it was. Um, and this is, if, if anybody wants to really dig into this part of the conversation, I would love, we'll share in the notes, um, to share your TED talk as well, where you, you know, fully, um, dig into this conversation.
[00:27:24] Deanna Kitchen: But can you tell us more about how LSD and THC can have such a positive effect on our wellbeing?
[00:27:33] Dr. Darvish: Yeah, so you know, when I was writing this Ted Talk, I was contemplating as to how to create it such that people will remember and what do we use THC and LSD for, to elevate us, to put us in the state of.
[00:27:51] Deanna Kitchen: To alter our mood. Yeah. Yeah.
[00:27:53] Dr. Darvish: right into this state of superficial joy, right? And so why don't we use THD and LSD on a day-to-day basis?
[00:28:01] Dr. Darvish: And so these became my two drugs of choice. T-H-C-L-S-D-T stands for truthfulness, H for humor, C for courage. Okay, so when we are truthful, truthfulness is the foundation of all very Jews. Think about being truthful. It takes away all the stress. You don't have to worry about, oh, did I lie here, or did I do this or did I, did I not say this or did I say this?
[00:28:24] Dr. Darvish: If you are really truthful with others, and most importantly, truthful with yourself, you're walking in alignment with yourself. And that is taking away all the stress within your system. And when we are, um. Reducing our stress, we allow for joy to take over, right? Humor, laughter is the best medicine. So finding humor and laughter in everything that we do, even in the stressful times.
[00:28:55] Dr. Darvish: Um, creating that joy through laughter. just smiling, you know, walking down the street and consciously smiling, looking in the mirror and just smiling at yourself. Just basic things to create humor and love and laughter creates our joy. Courage. Courage is about learning to face our challenges, um, bravely and, and. When we do that, we are actually staying in alignment with our truth. And when we again do that, then we are creating joy for ourselves because we are standing up to our own values, what feels right within us. Now, LSD, so that was THC,
[00:29:45] Deanna Kitchen: So to, I wanna recap these 'cause they're so beautiful. So truthfulness, uh, um, humor and courage.
[00:29:52] Dr. Darvish: yes.
[00:29:53] Deanna Kitchen: That's the, that the T-H-C-E-D to carry forward with us. Okay. Now let's talk about the, your next really helpful, and I mean certainly powerfully remembered acronym.
[00:30:05] Dr. Darvish: Yes. LS, D. So L is for learning. And if you think about what learning does, number one, when we learn something new, it brings us joy,
[00:30:16] Deanna Kitchen: Mm-hmm.
[00:30:16] Dr. Darvish: right? You think about how joyful kids are, and they're so excited to learn something new. You
[00:30:24] Deanna Kitchen: I remember being shocked. I read, uh, heard in a podcast several years ago that learning releases dopamine, like when we learn something new, and it was kind of that aha moment of like, oh, no wonder I'm always, you know, excited to tune into a podcast or have a, you know, read a new book. Or it's, it's really cool to think about,
[00:30:43] Dr. Darvish: it is.
[00:30:44] Deanna Kitchen: there's a biological process that's happening behind that.
[00:30:47] Deanna Kitchen: So learning something new is where we can, it gives, move ourselves into that state of constant joy. Okay.
[00:30:55] Dr. Darvish: s is for service. So what we've been talking about, most of this talk, this conversation, uh, and going back to the release of the oxytocin. So when we are of service to others, giving to charity, giving a hug, bringing flowers to someone, um, it's, um, promotes our joy, right? So we have to be conscious about these things. That's the thing is we have to be conscious about learning about service. And then the final one is detachment with, uh, which we just talked about, about letting go, letting go of our worries, of our fears, negative thoughts, our lifestyles that are maybe. Toxic, our regrets, our, uh, toxic styles of communication.
[00:31:38] Dr. Darvish: When we let go, we are opening this space, this door within our hearts, within our minds and cells, and even our soul to take on, to welcome, to usher in new ways of being, new ways of, of working new relationships, new jobs, and this just sense of wellbeing and joy. It's, it's something that I see. Uh, with, uh, my patients where when they are very stuck in, whether it's a relationship or in their job or they're just not happy when they actually start letting go of some of these physical and emotional toxins that suddenly doors open and they, they have this new opportunity for a new relationship or a new job that just fell into their laps.
[00:32:26] Dr. Darvish: And I think that is so powerful how the universe basically. Allows us to create more joy when we are open to it.
[00:32:36] Deanna Kitchen: Mm-hmm. I, I love what you said of that, that hollow read of being allowing to flow in and flow out, and there has to be an open pathway for that to happen, and so it's beautiful to look at what are the ways that we can remove the things that are holding that. Back from happening.
[00:32:55] Dr. Darvish: Absolutely. Absolutely. So, you know, and, and not to forget that, you know, the physical habits do play a major role like our sleep and our nutrition and exercise and, you know, all of these water intake and all of these things that, that biohackers are focusing on currently on our, on transforming our lifestyles and our habits.
[00:33:23] Dr. Darvish: Do play a major role, but the bigger portion that I believe is consciously creating joy when we do that, when we are consciously creating joy, it's a lot easier to get to bed on time. It's a lot easier to exercise. It's a lot easier to eat healthy and well, it's, it's a lot easier to take care of yourself because you feel this empowerment within you.
[00:33:49] Dr. Darvish: And so, you know. You may be at a place where you need to get to bed and get up and move and exercise, and that stimulates that dopamine release and helps you create joy. But don't forget that this other aspect of giving and sharing also creates joy. The learning, the service, the detachment, humor, the truthfulness, the courage.
[00:34:20] Dr. Darvish: Also creates joy.
[00:34:22] Deanna Kitchen: Which is so empowering because these are things, like you said, we can intentionally choose. You know, we can intentionally, consciously make these a part of our days and our habits. Um, and, and in that process, you know, we're not only healing our neighborhoods and communities, but truly healing our own bodies and bringing more wellbeing into our own lives.
[00:34:45] Deanna Kitchen: So it's just so, so inspiring, encouraging to know that we can. Walk with intentionality and have opportunity to make these choices that are going to help us become healthier and more joyful humans.
[00:35:02] Dr. Darvish: Absolutely, absolutely. I talk a lot about this combination of the science and the spirituality or the emotions in my book, the Golden Gate, because they do have, it's, there is that dual relationship. You can't. Do one without the other. You have to have your physical, um, system worked on, on a regular basis, like through nutrition and so forth.
[00:35:30] Dr. Darvish: But you also have to attend to your emotional and spiritual layer in order for you to feel, uh, like a golden gate, the gateway to joy, the gateway to transforming your life and the world around you. And, um, and so I go through the science as well as the emotions and the spiritual aspects of our wellbeing, um, and longevity in the book.
[00:35:59] Deanna Kitchen: I think that, uh, having read your book, it is such an empowering tool. I will say particularly as a woman who is approaching mid forties and really. I think there's so many transformations and transitions that happen for us, and I, as I say us, I do believe I'm encompassing probably 90 plus percent of our listeners.
[00:36:22] Deanna Kitchen: I think that we are, um, you know, predominantly women here. Not to say gentlemen are not welcome right alongside of us here in this podcast, in this movement. Um, but to say that I think that. Being a woman particularly, um, knowing, navigating, um, all of the different health, um, considerations that we carry, um, and all of the different social expectations that we carry.
[00:36:47] Deanna Kitchen: You know, your book was really empowering for me to look at how, what are the strengths that we carry as a woman and what are the ways that we are gonna support ourselves through these, this. Transition that, and I know many of our listeners today are in this same boat, either have made or are making, you know, as, as a woman.
[00:37:09] Dr. Darvish: Absolutely. And you know, it's not just about being a woman. It's about also those feminine qualities that women have and men have too. They just need to be nurtured. So if you think about the feminine qualities of compassion, of intuition, of caring, of love, of peace, these are more qualities that we tend to associate with feminine qualities, right?
[00:37:34] Dr. Darvish: Whereas the masculine qualities. Are more leadership and, um, groundedness and, um, intellectual and so forth. So we both have men and women. We both have these qualities. It's just that in today's world, we are facing a very male quality dominant force and the feminine qualities are missing. And so as women who have access to those qualities much more readily. Right. By strengthening those qualities in our work, in our businesses, in our family lives, and so forth, that we are able to bring back into balance the two wings of the bird. So if you've got a, if you've got a bird, and one wing represents the masculine qualities, and then the other wing represents the feminine qualities, if we just have the masculine qualities try to flap this wing and fly, that bird doesn't fly very high.
[00:38:41] Dr. Darvish: It needs the opposite. Wing to be just as equal to it for that bird to take off. And that's really the society for us to have a prosperous, peaceful society. We need both feminine and uh, masculine qualities. And what's very powerful to think about. Is in the last century, the feminine qualities are moving forward, moving up to equate themselves to the masculine qualities.
[00:39:12] Dr. Darvish: Uh, you see men being a lot more balanced nowadays versus before.
[00:39:20] Deanna Kitchen: Mm-hmm.
[00:39:21] Dr. Darvish: those, those qualities were a lot more significant in our, the masculine qualities were a lot more significant in our 15 and 20, 25 year olds. Now we're seeing the feminine qualities be just as. Prevalent in these young men as the masculine qualities and such a beautiful thing to see because it creates, it's, we're able to build that connection, those relationships a lot easier when those masculine and feminine qualities are more balanced.
[00:39:54] Dr. Darvish: Um, and, and if you think about it on a physical level, it's fascinating to think about this because testosterone and estrogen. The male hormone testosterone, the female hormone estrogen exists in both men and women,
[00:40:08] Deanna Kitchen: Mm-hmm.
[00:40:09] Dr. Darvish: right? If you just have testosterone in a man, their bones get weak, their libido is decreased.
[00:40:19] Dr. Darvish: They don't have that groundedness. A lot of things actually deplete their heart health weakens and um. When they do have that estrogen balancing out their testosterone, we tend to see stronger heart, stronger bones, stronger brains, better libido and so forth. And the same thing goes with women. When you see higher amounts of estrogen, you see a lot more inflammation in the woman.
[00:40:50] Dr. Darvish: And, um. Our brain may not be able to make decisions as well. Our bones may not be as strong as we bring in the testosterone to balance out that estrogen. Then we again see stronger bones, stronger heart, stronger brain, um, better libido. And also better decision making. So this balance of estrogen and testosterone is really powerful, not only at the hormonal level in our physical being, but also at the spiritual and quality level of the way we behave and act and see ourselves.
[00:41:32] Deanna Kitchen: Absolutely incredible to think about. You know, again, to things that I think sometimes we, we see play out on an engagement, interaction, character level. Um, and yet then to see it. Broken down biologically and say, this is, this is what is at play here and this is what we're seeing. What's the reflection of, of what's happening internally with us?
[00:41:56] Deanna Kitchen: And I love, like you've pointed so many times today, is that what we're choosing and what what we're thinking and what we're doing impacts. How we're feeling and, and our body's wellbeing. And then our body's wellbeing and balance impacts our ab a ability to be emotionally, intellectually, um, balanced and present in our lives and in our communities.
[00:42:18] Deanna Kitchen: It's just incredible to see that, that that tying connection in the way that interplays together. Um, I would love, um. For our, our listeners, if they were interested in learning more about, you know, this bi, this connection, this mind body connection, and how we can tap into so many things that are beyond biohacking.
[00:42:43] Deanna Kitchen: You know, tapping into, um, our service, finding humor, finding joy, living in a state of joy. Uh, if listeners were interested in learning more from you, can you share with us more about how, how we could do that?
[00:42:59] Dr. Darvish: Well, there's few ways. Um, one is to go to my personal website. DR Darvish, D-A-R-V-I-S-H, dr darvish.com. And I have a lot of podcasts that I've done throughout since 2004, I think way back. So for at least 20 years, uh, podcasts and radio shows. Um, there is a lot of blogs and there is access to, um, getting my book, the Golden Gate.
[00:43:28] Dr. Darvish: You can also purchase it on Amazon or any online bookstore. Then there is holistic.com, H-O-L-I-S-T-I-Q-U e.com. Holistic is our, uh, clinic, and you're welcome to set up a consult with me or one of my colleagues at the clinic to, um, review your wellbeing and physically, mentally, emotionally, and help you achieve.
[00:43:55] Dr. Darvish: Your utmost self, the best of you. So, um, yeah, dr darvish.com and holy stick.com. And you're welcome to listen to my TEDx
[00:44:06] Deanna Kitchen: Yes. I was just gonna say, we have to send people over to, to listen to your TED talks. I was, I was. So, it's just so inspiring and uplifting, you know, to think about these. Small decisions that we can make on a daily basis. You know, like, like you've shared with us with those, those really fun acronyms, LSD and THC, um, we will link all of that below in the show notes, um, so that people can continue learning from you.
[00:44:30] Deanna Kitchen: I think once in the most beautiful way. Well, like we said, you know, there's so much. Joy in learning. Um, the most beautiful way we've kind of opened Pandora's Box to really get to consider and look at, you know, this mind body connection and what's happening to us and through us when we are engaged. In acts of kindness and acts of service.
[00:44:53] Deanna Kitchen: Um, I think this is such wonderful food for thought, for all of us getting, um, to listen in today. And I personally, you know, I think that we've always kind of joked and said like, you kind of get addicted to kindness, but now it's, it's so clear. Like it, of course it makes sense, you know, it makes us, it makes us feel so good and it truly makes us more healthy, happy individuals.
[00:45:18] Deanna Kitchen: And so. I may, I am certain I'm not the only one who's inspired to leave this call today and take a look around me and find the ways that I can find more ways to serve and more ways to connect and, and reach out to others. So thank you for inspiring us with that here today, Dr. Darvish. It's truly exciting to think about, um, these.
[00:45:44] Deanna Kitchen: New levels and layers of learning that empower us into even more giving and sharing in our communities.
[00:45:52] Dr. Darvish: Thank you, Deanna. It's been just such a joy to share this, and it is such a great service that you are doing for the community at large. I am so inspired by you and your acts of kindness, and it reminds me of this beautiful Baha quote that says, in the garden of thy heart, plant not, but the rows of love.
[00:46:13] Deanna Kitchen: Mm. That is, that is what I'm going to write down and keep with me. I, I really, truly love that and it really is. It's so true. You know, when we, we allow these, those sometimes feels like seemingly small seeds, um, to be sown. I love that you mentioned, you know, like even in, in finding joy, you know, simply smile.
[00:46:32] Deanna Kitchen: You know, there's, it doesn't have to be something big or complicated to still bring. Have, have a return both in our lives and, and in in others. And it's, it's empowering for us to think about that, just plant those seeds of love in every way that we can, and they're going to continue to thrive and grow and flourish both in our lives and and in our others.
[00:46:54] Deanna Kitchen: Or in others. So.
[00:46:57] Dr. Darvish: Thank you ab, absolutely in the Garden of Thy Heart, platinum by the Rose of Love.
[00:47:02] Deanna Kitchen: Beautiful. Dr. Dervis, we love to wrap up our podcast with one question for all of our guests, um, and I think it just is reflect a reflection of how powerful even the smallest acts of kindness can be in every one of our lives. So I'd love for you to share with us, um. Is there a moment of kindness that someone once shared with you that you still carry in your heart with you today?
[00:47:30] Dr. Darvish: know. There is, I mean, there's many, but there one that jumps out at me, uh, currently is you. Every time you come to our clinic, you bring us some flowers and it touches not only my soul and heart, but I know it touches the heart and soul of my staff and the patients. So thank you for doing that because it is really, um, gives us even more of a reason to be doing what we do.
[00:48:01] Dr. Darvish: So thank you for bringing those flowers. It's just such a joy. It brings us such joy.
[00:48:07] Deanna Kitchen: Thank you for sharing that. I'm, it's just, it's always, um, you know, when you share flowers, there's sometimes that moment of interaction with someone and other times, and you can see the response, and you can see the, the reaction. And other times you don't know the ripples of kindness, um, that may potentially move out and forward.
[00:48:27] Deanna Kitchen: And so it's always encouraging and uplifting to know that. If there's ripples that are going beyond, you know what, what we can see and know in a day. So thank you for sharing that.
[00:48:39] Dr. Darvish: Yes, of course. So, you know, when I go to the front desk and there is few, or at least one little vase of flowers, like, that's Deanna, isn't it?
[00:48:51] Deanna Kitchen: You know what's so what I love so much about the growing kindness movement, like what's so beautiful is that like the more that we let things go, like in a way, like that peace process of letting go, um, and letting go, but inviting others in to join, um, what what's so incredible for me to think about is.
[00:49:13] Deanna Kitchen: The thousands of people who are participating in this small but tremendously powerful act of kindness and just gifting flowers in their communities at, at the doctor's offices, they visit at the libraries to lonely, elderly neighbors, you know, and you think about that multiplied exponentially. Um, it's just like you said at the beginning, it's such an honor to be able to.
[00:49:37] Deanna Kitchen: Um, have so many incredibly supporting and inspiring people you know around you. Um, that's truly been my gift and my honor and my privilege is to be surrounded by this incredible community who are just exponentially, you know, sending out these ripples of kindness in the world. And so it's really beautiful to think about just those single bouquets and single blooms, you know, shared all throughout the world.
[00:50:05] Deanna Kitchen: The impact they have that we may not always see, but what we know is truly bringing, um, more joy and more beauty into the world.
[00:50:13] Dr. Darvish: Absolutely. Absolutely. Thank you so much for sharing, sharing yourself and sharing. Um, sharing this, this opportunity to, to give, it's really a powerful, like you said, rippling effect that it has on so many people that you don't even realize.
[00:50:34] Deanna Kitchen: Mm-hmm.
[00:50:35] Dr. Darvish: And as you know, as Virginia sat here said, give for hugs a day for survival.
[00:50:40] Dr. Darvish: Eight hugs a day for maintenance, and 12 hugs a day for growth. So even if you don't, even if you can't give a flower, just go give a hug to somebody.
[00:50:48] Deanna Kitchen: love that. That's absolutely the most encouraging reminder to us all today.
